An almost retraction...

In my medication post in which I was whining about PCOS and "well meaning female friends" insisting the grass was greener on my side of the fence because my side has no periods, regardless of other negative ailments that come along with my yard, I focused on how the grass is greener thing is not always greener.

I knew I could point this out because I don't play the greener grass thing. Or so I thought.

Tinka called to make sure I was not necessarily referring to a specific person. This led us to a conversation about there are always situations where at some point every one wants the greener grass. I agreed but knew I was much better than that, especially if the grass in question was a sensitive grass area. Or so I thought.

Well I went to get my hair cut shortly there after and told the stylist how I wish my hair grew faster. She said that every person she has ever dealt with doesn't like something about their hair and wishes it was different. She pointed out that those with thick hair want it to be thinner. Those with thin hair what it to be thicker. Curly hair needs to be straight and straight would be so much better curly. If it grows too fast the cut doesn't last long....blah blah blah. I told the stylist that all that didn't really matter to me because all those other people she was talking about had positive things where as my hair grows extremely slow and so therefore it was not good. "Come on", I said, "I don't care what the "perceived" problems are with all these people with great hair. I could totally deal with the "problems" if my hair just grew faster.

Then an amazing thing happened. I looked into the mirror and saw Tinka sitting on my shoulder rolling her eyes, laughing and pointing at me. Not really, but Tinka was in my thoughts as I was rolling my eyes, laughing and pointing at me. I thought of our previous conversation and realized I just played the grass is greener.

I called Tinka to tell her about my revelation and we enjoyed a good laugh. Then I realized how much I do wish my grass was greener. I realized that I could think of several things of Tinka's that are sooooo much greener than mine. Despite her wishing her grass was greener about two things in which I would mow lawns until the cows come home to have, I realized I have insensitively brushed her off by saying, 'even though you think of it as a negative and I think you are nuts to think that, I could totally deal with the negatives just to have the problems you wish you didn't have'.

Hmmmmmm Who does that sound like? I can now admit it, I sound like my "well meaning female" friend in my PCOS rant.

Don't get me wrong here, even though I realize I play the grass is greener game, this post is not a total retraction of my PCOS rant. You must understand, my problems are different and worse than yours and my grass is brown. Yours is green and plush, so it is ok that I want your grass even though you think your grass is light green. But remember, you must be totally senstive to my grass and see it for what it is...brown and dead.

LOL, I am just joking. It was a very simple moment that made me see that I too am the "well meaning female". It was quite the moment to see how I need to be thankful for any grass that I have.

Trying to preserve my self with medications...

I write this post as an outlet for my emotions. Not something I do with this blog. But maybe if I put it out there in WWW land, I will motivate myself to change.

I went to the doctor for a prescription refill and walked out with five new prescriptions. I was saddened to think that I had hit a point in my life that my health/life truly relied on medication. Is it horribly serious? No, not like those of who I read about in blog world. Though the severity of mine is practically self induced with a minor role with genes. The knowledge of knowing my bad habits would increase my health problems and then me allowing it to get to that point just saddens me. What do I have?

PCOS for starters.

I have had it since the spring of my freshman year in high school. It has plagued me with problems with my hair falling out on my head and growing in places it shouldn't. It has plagued me with acne. It has plagued me with infertility. It has plagued me with constant weight problems. It has plagued me with the feeling of not being a female because of the extra testosterone following freely.

I do not have cycles unless they are induced by medication. Many, many, many of my female friends tell "Oh, if that could be me! I hate periods! Oh, never to have one again! You are so lucky!". Lucky...(sigh) yes, very lucky. But I don't feel lucky. Simply not having a period is not luck on my part. I am not choosing to not have a period, my body chose for me. Not having a period but still having the hormones needed to have a period is one thing but not to have a period because you have little female hormones and a lot of male hormones is quite different. There is no luck in feeling like your husband is married to hefty lumberjack with a five o'clock shadow. But the ramblings of PCOS is for another post. It is just part of my overall problem that I have allowed to spawn new problems.

Insulin Resistance is next.

This and PCOS are linked. Hmmm, how lucky.

Pre-Diabetes follows close behind.

Again, this and the previous two "syndromes" are linked.

High Cholesterol and my newly found high blood pressure are yet another part of the chain.

Again, related to the pleasantries aforementioned.

There are several other little lucky ailments that go along with PCOS that I will talk about in another post but they aren't really detrimental to my health. They are more superficial daily reminders, that stare back at me in the mirror, of how lucky I am.

Boy, it sounds like I am real downer this evening. But one of my pet peeves is to be told I am lucky for not having a period. The conversations usually go like this:

A well meaning female: "I wish I didn't have to deal with periods."

Me: "I would rather deal with a period and be close to having balanced hormones than what I have going on now."

The well meaning female: "No periods? That is a no brainer for me."

Me: "I can see just not having periods would be great as long as your body still works but for me it is not that simple."

The well meaning female: "I don't think it would bother me. Just the fact of not having periods for what ever reason would be great."

The stickler for me is that these well meaning women are glossing over the fact that no periods for me = a slue of other health problems. And for what ever reason, I want them to acknowledge it. Oh my goodness, I know I could totally get into a "Deddy" conversation about how the real problem lies in that I am allowing others to dictate what I feel.

You hopefully wouldn't say to a person in a wheelchair, "Wow, you are so lucky that you can't walk. You don't have to worry about the hassle of buying nice looking shoes that won't hurt your feet." That would be rude and show a severe lack of empathy and sympathy. Is my plight the same as a person who can't walk? No, not at all. My point in this rambling has become this: just because you can't see medical problem, doesn't mean it is not real problem that may have emotional and physical issues that are not blatant.

Well now that I have sat here and rambled as a negative Nellie, I will close on a positive note. Maybe another woman/girl with PCOS will google and this blog will come up, then offer feeling of "I know how you feel!".

My next post should be positive. Maybe I will discuss what changes I should do.

Another year...

Another year has come and gone. Obviously with no fanfare but with a great deal of reflectiveness. I am not unhappy about my age nor overly concerned with it either but the thought of "where did the time go" did cross my mind several times today. Then this evening, the kids and I watched another old movie, Sunset Blvd, on TMC. That snapped me back into reality! I do not want to end up as a Norma Desmond!

But alas my age is catching up to me and I must turn in for the night. I no longer can pull an all nighter and still function the next day. More on my reflective thoughts tomorrow. I am sure you will be checking back to read.

A few of my favorite things...

There are many things that bring me happiness and many things that bring an instant smile to my face but one thing that stands in the forefront is of Bro. R in his purple suit. He just pulls this look off so well. How many people can wear a purple suit and look this nice? He and his wife are such a nice couple and they seem to always have up building experiences. Bro. R definitely has a way with words, and when he wears his purple suit, it brings an instant smile to my face! Its odd how the sight of him in this suit brings such a feeling of happiness to me. It is almost a calming effect. I was able to talk him and his wife into letting me take their picture with his suit so I could hang it in my house. I thought I would share it. I hope it brings a warm fuzzy feeling to you too.

I was tagged

My monkey bread friend tagged me for fear I had left the blogging world. I was asked to share 7 random facts about myself. Here goes...

1. I am totally fascinated by the Amish. I would love to live plain and dress plain. I love to watch the PBS reality shows that have people "live back in time". One show was about several people who lived in Canada for a year in the late
1800's. Jason and I could totally do that kind of show and love it.

2. I day dream of me disco dancing. I love the Bee Gees and picture myself dancing with John Travolta. I know I would be a great disco dancer.

3. One thing I think that is amazingly sexy is boots. I was so sad when Jason had to throw away his black lace up steel toed work boots. Then I saw him in his motorcycle riding boots...man o' man. Then I saw him on the job site one day in his hard hat, tool belt, a little bit of cement on his cheek and his work boots. Wow...I told him he was just teasing me.

4. If I could, I would have eleven or more children.

5. Because of my job, I know a whole lot about Medicare. I really enjoy my job and I really enjoy working with those who have Medicare. It is a very rewarding job.

6. I enjoy eating seafood (shrimp, lobster, crab and scallops) with chocolate milk.

7. I have "permanent makeup". I had my top eye lids done and my lips (the whole lips not just the liner) and having it done was one of the best things I have ever done. Eyeliner on the top lid, lipstick and maybe some powder has been my makeup routine for over 12 years. And in a few visits to the best person ever for this, I eliminated having to apply two out of the three things I wear. It was not without some pain but so worth it.

So now you know a little bit more about me. Do you feel closer to me? I now am going to pass the tag torch to my sister, Shelly.

Toilet Texting...

My mind and speech are not usually in the gutter, so don't worry, my "toilet texting" is in no way offensive in speech, tone, or content. But I thought this post was blog worthy since I read a news clip from a Baltimore TV station about the odd places people from where people text (click here for a link to the story on the TV station website).

The site states a whooping 79% of those surveyed admitted to texting from the bathroom! Are you shocked? Are you saying "well I never..!". Well, my friends, I am here to say, my name is Stacy and I toilet text! Yes, I feel lost without having my phone while doing "my business" in the bathroom. Have I gone too far? Admittedly...maybe. It is kinda sad when I am in the bathroom and one of my children notice I do not have my phone and offer to bring it to me or really sad when I realize I forgot my phone as I made a mad dash to the toilet and I have to holler for someone to bring it to me.

How did I start this habit? A few years back, Spam was visiting me and I had just started a new part time job. I was so nervous, which made my stomach naturally upset. The only time I could let Spam know how it was going was when I made my frequent potty breaks. I believe Spam jokingly asked if I was in the bathroom each time I texted her those few days and I said yes. I have more manners than to have a conversation on the toilet. Then after Spam went back home, I had my phone in my pocket one day at home while in the bathroom and thought it would be funny to text her that I was using the bathroom but not at work. We had a good laugh. Then it became an ongoing joke for me to do that. Then I had to branch out one day when Spam was unable to respond to my text. I think I caught a few people by surprise when they found out my secret.

There you have it. So next time you get a text from me, you may not want to know where I am.

My favorite commercial

I haven't had time to post this week but fortunately it is not because any one is sick!! But I thought this was worth adding to my blog because it is my favorite current commercial. The "boss" does a great job. I could watch it over and over.



Just thought I would share a laugh.

The burning of purses....

I have never really been a purse lady. Oh, I have had my share of purses since I was a preteen but I have never been true to the purse. One year a friend gave me the neatest wallet purse a woman could ever ask for and I wore it out. It was small, but not too small. It held my check book, a pen, bank cards, lipstick, glasses and my keys. I have never found one of similar quality to this day.

After the demise of this wonderful little carrying apparatus, I took to asking friends to hold my lipstick or keys or ID. Then one day I decided to stuff my money in my bra along with my lipstick. WOW, I was liberated from the need of other people's pockets.

Then along came babies. I dreaded dragging around a large diaper bag with things I didn't think I would use for a trip to Wal Mart. So even with the triplets, we used a small diaper bag (the one they send you home with from the hospital). It carried three bottles (with formula powder in it ready for water to be added), six diapers and a pack of travel wipes. I felt that if we needed a change of clothes, maybe that was the point we needed to just head home. So for several years, the triplets and I enjoyed shopping at Wal Mart with freshly stained clothes from what ever lunch adventure we just had.

When #4 came along, I don't really remember carrying a diaper bag. I am sure I did but just having one baby, come on, that is a walk in the park. I was able to breastfeed him so there was no need for bottles, maybe just a diaper or two and wipes. He really didn't have a need for toys because the triplets always entertained him. #4 was almost not even like having a baby. But that is another posts on having multiples plus one.

I digress...so for years I would sneak and hide or put what ever was needed in my bra and feel carefree of the worry of a purse. I think my husband has had mixed feelings. He liked the idea of not carrying my lipstick but to be around while I was digging for it in my chest was a little embarrassing. I, too, tried to hide when I had to dig.

Then one day I was with my cousin at a cash register and without flinching, she dug around for her cash in her bra and gave it to the cashier. Again, the feeling of liberation came over me that I too could proudly dig in my bra for my necessities of life without shame.

So from that point on I stuffed anything that would fit in my bra and felt good about it.

I bring this subject up because yesterday I was walking into Wal Mart and was not wearing an outfit with pockets, I had no purse, and no children with me that had pockets that could be in charge of the car keys. So I stuffed my very small wallet in one side and cell phone on the other side. Then I thought, I could put the remote from my keys where the uderwires meet in the middle and let the keys hang over (under my shirt). I tried it and wow! I marched empty handed into Wal Mart and dug what I needed to out at the register. Yes, my boob did ring once and I feel a little like Get Smart when I pull the phone out of my bra. And yes, I have friends who joke about my boobs ringing or vibrating (if I am in the movies or at work).

Ok, get to the point Stacy...the point is, I chuckled at myself yesterday because I thought of a whole generation of women who burned their bra as a sign of liberation yet I feel liberated being able to wear a bra and stuff it with anything I please, including my boobs. If I was one who didn't care to wear a bra out in public (mind you at home I have no need to hold money or my ID near my person) then I guess I would have to stuff things under my bra-less boobs. As you know with age, things go south. But despite the direction my boobs insist on going, a bra brings them back up to attention and offers me lots of "pockets". And as long as you are not wearing a clingy shirt, no one will really notice until your left boob rings or you are paying at the checkout.

Just a rambling I wanted to share.

PS I do have a neat little pocket purse my friend made me for when my bra becomes overloaded.

Do you remember

Talking with a friend today, I was reminded how fun the kid shows used to be. What a special time it brings me back too. I guess I listened to Kenny Rogers one too many times on our trip. Well here are a few clips that bring a smile to my face with a blast from the past. The last two are mainly for those who grew up in Nashville in the 80's. I am sure I will remember more and search youtube.com! Do you have any suggestions?

Picture Pages




Simon in the land of chalk drawings



Hello Nashville (I still know all the words!)



Music Box Dancer (Channel 2 News)

Southern ...lesson #1

Being in the South this past week, I realize how little the outside world really knows how a Southern talks. I will give you a quick lesson on two major things.

One being "fixing to." I am fixing to go to bed. I am fixing to leave work. I am fixing to eat supper. It simply means I am about to...(insert chosen action).

Another item is "iced tea". It is not flavored tea or unsweet tea poured in a glass to have sweetener added at will. Iced tea is already made sweet tea.

How do I make it? I personally heat water in a pot until it boils. I take it off the burner and let 5 family size tea bags steep for awhile. I then pour about a cup of sugar in the jug I am using for tea (usually a washed gallon milk jug) then add VERY hot water to the sugar and stir or shake until it is completely dissolved. Then I pour the tea into the jug of sugar water and add cold water until it is filled.

Is my sweet tea the correct most Southern way of making sweet tea. I don't know. This is just the way I was taught. My family loves it. My western raised husband and children love it.